Hospital humour

I have a great team looking after me, here in the hospital and outside. Some have 'assigned' roles and other have assumed important functions. Among those is a friend who has appointed herself Minister of Funny for the occasion. When she heard that the next stage in my recovery would be marked by 'passing wind' I received a series of appropriate jokes.

Here are a couple of them.

Your ass is so tight that when you fart, only dogs can hear it.

What happened to the blind skunk? He fell in love with a fart.

When I wrote back to say that I had passed that milestone and was on to another I received these.

Have you heard about that new movie "Constipation"? It hasn’t come out yet.

 Why does Tigger smell so bad? You’d stink too if you played with Winnie the Pooh all day. (I have to get better ones)

I am proud to report that the second milestone has been reached. My new goal is getting rid of some of the holes and associated appliances that are scattered all over my body. Does anyone write jokes for that?